Humans are being monetized and that’s a problem…
“He has to be a bread winner”
“Kids cost too much”
“She’s worth spending money on”
Everyone is brought down to monetary value and I don’t like that, it’s capitalist and wrong. See humans as humans and act accordingly.
“He has to be stable and responsible”
“Children are an honored responsibility”
“She’s worth my love and care”
I’m telling you, words change actions more than you know.
Yesterday I told you all about your worth being more than the table, and I meant that. Not only in monetary value, but in value that you bring with your mind, body, and soul. Everything is in context, we have to remember that corporations try to get over on people as much as possible, and if you know you are being underpaid by a corporation that has millions, fight for it! When valuing people in your everyday life, leave the money out of it.
I’m going to talk more in depth about this in my educational series, but monetary value in everyday conversations decreases the interaction. I know we want ambitious people in our lives, especially if we are ambitious ourselves, but the problem becomes when we are valuing that as monetary value only instead of character. I tell you this, there’s nothing wrong with wanting it all, but I’ve had friends and dates that are high value in income, that would betray you in a minute, and have no character. I have had friends that are ambitious and may not be where they want financially, but they are loyal. I had a friend that was a stripper because it helped her get where she needed to be at the time, and she had great character. Then again I have had friends that have the money and the character. I am not saying which lifestyles are right or wrong, but I am saying that character trumps all and we can grow together. The most important thing is aligning with people who are designed for your journey. I remember when I went to church, we were wrongfully taught that the only beneficial friends we could have had to be Christian as well. I had a friend at work who was not necessarily a believer, and had a contrasting lifestyle, but was a loyal and true friend that I felt peace around, one of the last friends standing when I transitioned to my African centered lifestyle. Times and situations showed that he was loyal, more loyal than any church friend I ever had, and a very supportive friend. I said that to say, you may have an idea based on outside factors who is “good” and who is not, but character stands in the times when you need the person, not how much they make, or what they believe. Now equate beliefs to money.
Corporations pay people, they can easily say that job A is worth Z amount of dollars, it does not mean that the person who fills that position is worth Z amount of dollars, it just means that they filled the position. Is the person who works at McDonalds around hot oil and high demands lazy? No. I find it interesting that people will walk into McDonalds, order food, expect it to be ready, and insult the person who works there to say “they only work at McDonalds”. If that’s the case, cook at home! Again, character trumps all, I had to realize for myself that hardworking people are everywhere, I don’t have more value because I got a master’s, even though I’m proud of my master’s, but I have value because I treat people well, I inspire people, and people overall have had great interactions with me that they value because many have said that they are life transforming (their words not mine). That has nothing to do with money. I don’t care if you work at McDonalds or the CEO of Apple, how do you treat people? Obviously when people try to bring harm your way, and you see they are no good in terms of how they move, then you stay away and protect yourself.
When it comes to relationships, I believe the number 1 reason people cannot get it together in relationships is because they are too busy matching the person with what society says success is. What happened to growing with people? Millennials are the worst with it I think, I am a millennial, we suffer between western tradition and doing our own thing. On one hand, men want to maintain power in relationships by making money and providing, and women want the same thing; on the other hand, everyone wants to be progressive, which is really taking it back to the days before patriarchy. I notice a lot of women and men struggle with it in the actual relationship. Everyone talks a good game, but in the actual relationship they cannot separate western indoctrination from what they want. That is why we hear that the number one cause of divorce is money. I think that society plays a big part in making people feel insecure in their own relationships. When a man is not making money to take care of his family and let his wife be at home, he feels like he failed the community; if a woman makes more than her man, immediately he feels useless and intimidated that society will say he’s not a man. I think all this takes away from the idea that we can build together, and what we make is nobody’s business, be a united front! People forget, and I say this all the time, that roles vary; at home I am a wife but at work I am whatever my title is, the 2 are separate, and at home I am building with my man despite what I have done at work today. Again, as I said above, corporations pay people, what does the dollar amount someone decided to pay me have to do with who I am at home? There are many parts to relationships, security is 1, but security comes in many forms other than money. You have heard of rich people who have gone broke from spending, but a person will see their wealth as a determining factor before saying that they’re irresponsible.
I believe the bleeds into how people see children. In my generation, I hear so many people refer to children as monetary only, not people, but dollar signs. How can I be thinking of a child as a monetary burden? A young person, a reflection of me with a soul and value and purpose. Yes, in this society, to take care of children costs money, but trust me, as a teacher who has worked with young children, half of the things they have they don’t need. Spoil your kids by all means, but I have seen people sacrifice rent money with my own 2 eyes to buy their child a toy. I know in life there are problems, I am not minimizing them, but even if you don’t want children, don’t minimize their precious lives to a financial burden. Trust me, I grew up as well taken care of, but my dad made me read books, play outside, learn piano, sports, road trips, and all sorts. Not all of those things costed money but created memories. When people see their children as a monetary burden, people grow up thinking they are only worth something if they have money, or they grow up thinking they can’t ask anybody for anything because they were always seen as a burden. In fact, don’t have kids if you see them that way, wait to be healed first. Again, I know it costs money to take care of your children, but that isn’t a burden they should have to bear.
We can change our view on how we see people, then deal with them accordingly. I am willing to build a life with people who have good character, ambitious, and bring value to my life in more ways than 1. How much money they make is irrelevant, as life happens, and I find the best people have brought joy to my soul. Also, we should not assume that someone doesn’t have, or has, based on what they have on or what they own. Everyone does not hold the same values and want the same thing, get to know the people, not their things.
How do you define yourself? Well, let me help you, check out Melanated Gem and empower yourself with words that describe who you are. For example, the Beautiful Headband is a reminder that you are beautiful in all forms…