I’m Black! I’m African! I’m distinctly my race or ethnicity that separates me from any other “of color”….. I have no allies. Each issue faced by “of color” is amplified when it comes to black people, especially Black Women, so I need black solutions, not “of color” solutions
When the system, has systemically implemented laws and withheld resources that strategically impact black people, while other “of color” people are flourishing in those same areas, and have received their reparations, there is no “of color”, it’s systemic racism against blacks people. “Of color” doesn’t have the legacy of slavery that built the nations and groundwork for other “of color” to be free; so when it comes to us, it’s one color, black.
No “of color” shows up for our marches or shares their wealth with us. Should they? They got theirs, every man for himself, they’ll always protect theirs, so we have to protect ours. All the other “of color” are straight. When white people show up for our marches, they’re trying to be the hero, I have marched with them enough times to know.
We have the right to be about ourselves right now, it’s not selfish, it’s necessary. If your house was falling down would you go and pay for someone else’s to get fixed? Yea, doesn’t make sense to me either.
Remember in 2019; I did a little thing; I launched an app on the Apple store… well unfortunately I invested my money into developers that had bad intentions for my product. Either way, that’s in the past; the new, improved DiasporAfri app is coming back! This is extremely exciting as it’s an idea that hasn’t been implemented before in this way. Of course I won’t tell you, you’ll have to wait and see! Just know it’s along the lines of uniting the Diaspora.
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I speak to people’s strengths, why? Because I am strong. I hate the sheep mentality of empowering people based on their weaknesses, it’s capitalist, & keeps people believing that there will always be something wrong with them, just so that they can follow you. I am well versed in the problems, but I create and implement solutions, for myself, and individuals, so they can collectively impact the world. Not just any old way, but according to God’s design for them. I would love for everyone who encounters me to leave feeling that they can become the the teacher, and never have to swindle or deceive people.
I talk a lot about my teaching experiences in Namibia, because of the nature of the Himba people that I never encountered anywhere in the world, but I have been teaching for a long time, and I have always been in positions where I have had to train in one way or the other to bring up the skill sets & talents of individuals. I know the results I’ve achieved with every student or client in front of me. Therefore; I recognize that many people do have a mentality of weakness, unfortunately, especially amongst us as Black people – even the successful people – somehow feeling that their life is dependent on some outward validation by these biased institutions, and feeling that they are indebted to it and can’t stand up to it. I understand why, I get it, 400 years is a long time, so no judgement, but, then I come along, confident and excited to be a Black girl, just because I am, no prerequisites of accomplishments, and people think it’s something else, or think it needs to be validated. As I have said in the past, I have had many people in one way or the other tell me, “you’re confident around white people”, as if white people are the only people on earth, lol, simply because I correct them or challenge them, or don’t take their word for it. I had to realize that people are not used to us as Black people being free, not used to us standing in our truth regardless of naysayers, not used to seeing Black people not only be confident just around other Black people, but everyone and everywhere. Who am I dimming my light for? A mere human? Chile, I was created by God, it’s a concept many people forget, the only one who gave me light to shine is God, so I’m doing a disservice if I dim it for humans.
Therefore, I speak to people’s strengths, because I have enough strength in myself to instill in others. I speak to a place of, yes, you aren’t perfect, but you are IT! Well, I’ve have more people try to tell me why that’s not the case, than why it is. I know for sure and for a fact that it is a result of the inferiority complex that has been instilled in us, because capitalism requires oppression, and people feel the need to be better than. How many black people in my life have told me verbatim “white people are better than us, that’s just how it is”, I’d be able to pay our reparations if I had a dollar for every time I heard that, and not just from “low income” folks, but people who sit in high places. However, my strength is not to be better than, but to be better with. Follow me on this journey…
Well, in 2018 I started having this strong interest in Black women’s lives. I am a Black woman, but many people know that as a woman sometimes the needs of men is somehow uplifted over ours, and we care about our needs in relation to them. Not all the time, and not for everybody, but it seems to be a trend amongst many women to see their value in men, and see other women’s value in what men say. I understand patriarchy so I’m not mad, but as for me; I started to only see Black women and literally celebrate everything we do even if it was with an “I don’t care” attitude. I was just like yesssss, tell them queen!
Everyone knows music is the love I can’t live without. Suddenly I started only listening to the music of Black women only, all genres, didn’t care the content. I had no more interest in men’s music, and music I had previously shunned, I said “why am I shunning it?, I want to hear what Black women have to say no matter how we’re saying it”. Well, the google queen in me came out; I found every female Black artist I could find and added them to my playlists. Needless to say, it’s now 2021 and 99% of my time I’m listening to Black girl music, and 97% of that time on brown and dark skinned girls who are often not promoted in the industry. It’s not a pity party, the music is beyond great; and although I know why, I can’t understand why the music of these women isn’t promoted like their light counterparts – I digress.
By the way, I also released 4 of my own self produced songs in February 2020, the point was to perform them, which I did once, 2 weeks before quarantine started. (Shameless plug).
As I listen to our music, in correlation with our actions, and study of our history, I started to understand more of how we’ve been muted, more than any other women, and how my actions in particular, as a confident woman, have been seen. If we go back a little bit; I have told the story of how I never initially understood women’s rights movement because I am grateful that I have dad who made sure I was the most confident Black girl to enter the world. He gave me a confidence that I’ve heard many Nigerians say haven’t been given to their daughters by dads (again not all), so validation of confidence is something I never needed from a soul, however, I never understood people’s misconception of my confidence. I remember my boss in 2019, even though I was the highest performer, saying and questioning why I was so confident, but he never treated the confident white girl that way, and she was just rude and loud. My dad never attached my relevance to a man, he attached it to simply who I am, always reminding me of my greatness. People will have a woman believing her confidence is a result of some lack of something. Nah, I believe in myself more than any human could, so I began, and even continued to instill that confidence in other Black women and see them as I see myself, whether she is seen as an acceptable woman in society or not. If we are going to be built up, it starts with us uniting against barriers put up that want us to fight each other!
I don’t believe in simply motivating, I believe in collaborating -whatever need you have let’s accomplish it together. So I began to realize, as I was continuing my journey of uplifting the Global Black Diaspora, that I needed to uplift the voices of Black women beyond any other voice, and it started naturally happening. I am not a man-hater, I love men, and I love the importance of men to build strong families as God designed it, trust me. However, I realize that beyond a voice there is a strength I needed to tap into that is never talked about. Well I talk about it in part 8 of my Strength of Black Women course being offered as part of my Dear Black People™ Webinar Series! Sign up now!
I hope to see you there as I continue this story and many more 💛
~ Ndidi Love ~
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