As I was fighting for the gift that I knew was inside of me, distractions came, interruptions came. Something was sparked in me years ago, 2010 to be exact, and I was taken on this journey which I now know as the journey to the promised land. I am an outgoing person, so a lot of times, people want to be around me. Within every institution I’ve been a part of whether school, church, or work; I’ve missed the mark, attaching myself to people, places, & things that I had no business being a part of. It’s not that these people, places, or things were horrible, and some were even really nice, it just wasn’t aligned with my purpose, & God had something he has been trying to get out of me. Each time I knew deep down in my heart and my spirit that keeping myself around this person, place, or thing will hinder me from getting to the end result. God loves us so much that whatever our purpose is, so long as we fight for it, it will come to pass. So starting on this journey I said prayers like “anything that is not for me let it hurt me so bad that I never wanted again.” And because of my stubbornness, although I would always receive dreams and inklings in my spirit to at least not become so close to a person, place, or thing, I didn’t listen, so that thing would end up having to hurt me. I always see the good in everything which can be a blessing but it can also be a hindrance, because I ignore all signs and continue holding on to what I know I should let go of. Most recently, I joined a church that I know I should not have joined, I literally lied to myself against the many dreams and inklings that I had, even sometimes making a bad dream seem good. The first time I went to join, I was fully dressed, feeling good, about to leave the house, and I began to vomit…all day long. Nothing out of the ordinary had happened. And I hadn’t eaten anything different. The second time I went to join, and actually did join, my paperwork got lost for a week, of all the submissions given to join, mine got lost. But despite the knot in my stomach, I stayed, what I used to think was the devil trying to hold me back, I now realize is God. I am not speaking against church; to be in a community of faith where we are aligned is obviously a good thing, but it was crazy at the time because I watched a video where a woman said God told her not to join a church, and she listened, and joined another church, met her husband, and started her own ministry. Not that my story would mimic that, but I knew it’s possible for God to instruct us not to join a particular community of faith. So as a result of staying, In 2016 I had a group of friends who I told in the beginning, I did not want to befriend them in a deep way; that I could be friends with them individually but I didn’t want to go to deep with them. They all convinced me that what we had going was good and that we could be a blessing to so many through our friendships; and despite my strong spirit telling me not to, I went ahead with it, even playing dumb (I am not blaming anybody, completely my fault for not listening to my spirit). Looking back now, I wish I had listened because, where are they now? Nowhere to be found in my life. Two of them betrayed me,(which I dreamt about and someone prophecied before it happened) the others never sat right in my spirit, and two others moved away, which is all fine, and I’m not here to say that these are bad people, but what God wanted out of me required me once again to be in solitude, not dedicating my time to friendships he didn’t design for me in the first place. It’s not that God doesn’t want me to have friends, but God wanted me to have one or two solid friends that were in alignment with where he was trying to take me. It doesn’t matter how good something, someplace, or someone looks or how someone makes it sound, if it doesn’t feel right and if it is not designed for us then it will hinder our very purpose. This time God had me learn the extra hard long way. Right before I met them, I had started my blog, the one you’re reading now. Actually, I rebranded it, but I had just gotten done being so consumed by the story of Joseph in the old testament and it inspired me to rebrand my blog to where it is today. So it made sense that suddenly I would have a distraction. You see even though on the surface it looks like we were a group of friends praying together, worshiping together, and having fun, the fact of the matter is they drew me away from completely focusing on the message that God had inside of me. I would even remove myself away sometimes for maybe a week at a time, and I would get complaints that I don’t need to do all that. I would respond by saying that I need to focus. I know myself, I prefer a couple close friends, and small settings, I don’t need a whole bunch of people around me, especially with my gift, & it was prophecied to me around that time that because I have the gift of mercy, people will try to take advantage of it.
Distractions have always been my problem, you see, we have to understand the trajectory of our lives and the patterns that have shaped us. I’ve always been one on a mission, however, from my school days, the only complaint from my teachers is that I’m easily distracted. So fast forward, from 2010 until now, each and every time I would have a serious amount of alone time with God, all in my bible, receiving revelations from God, right after, I would run into a distraction. The Bible tells us that will happen, that shortly after we have a revelation, the evil one will quickly try to snatch it away; but God knew and knows my spirit, and that no matter what it takes, I would get to the culmination of this message that has been carved out for me to give.
This year, once I had a bad dream about something, I strategically cut it off. It was hard, but I let it go. I’ve left two jobs this year, and the one I entered this year definitely was not for me; I even fell on my way into the interview & hurt my leg so bad I needed stitches, but I still took the job. That whole morning went bad, it was like God was trying to tell me don’t take it, why I took it I don’t know, but it was just another thing that I had to leave behind. I had to leave a couple friends behind, had to leave a relationship behind, but each and everyone of those things still added a blessing to my life that only contributed to the message that I’m here telling today. God knew that the moment I left some of those things behind, more would be revealed to me, and that’s exactly what happened. I left the job I took on this year the first time, after having accepted another job, and I created the website that you’re on now along with my business cards, my new platform for all social media, the logo and color scheme, and the photo shoot. That was a week long process where I was home being productive. I ended up not taking on the other job, in hopes of a better position and pay that was being offered by my old job, which I received but it was useless, but the moment I stepped back into the old job that God had drawn me away from (against my better judgement), suddenly, I felt like my brain was drained, I couldn’t think right, I couldn’t produce what it was that I had just produced the week before, so I knew again that I would have to leave again, because what I did 40 hours a week was to fuel me and give life to my purpose, it was like that job drained my purpose. When I decided to leave the second time, I said I won’t look back, I accepted another position elsewhere, and I didn’t even tell anybody that I was going; but the moment I left, all these revelations and ideas came back to me and even more was revealed. The truth is 8 is a precious number, and in this eight years I’ve had many distractions, I’ve gone back-and-forth, up and down, but there’s no better feeling than writing this blog post right now to let everyone know that I MADE IT! I made it to the promise of the message that God has given me to give, and I’m willing to risk it all to keep it now. I’m at a point where it doesn’t matter who or what it is; if it doesn’t fit, I don’t want it.
We have an identity as a global Black people in God that we need to reclaim so that we can rest on this earth. There is a rest on this earth for Black people, & we will enjoy our land and receive the benefits of the work and toil of our forefathers.
In 1619, the first slaves (slavery as we know it), were brought to Virginia by colonizers. Next year is the 400th year of our captivity. We, the Igbos, the global Black people, translated to Hebrews by the Jews mentioned in Revelation 2:9 and 3:9 must begin to understand who we are, that 400 years ago, we were scattered into the earths four corners (for the second time), this time, from the Bight of Biafra. Having our identity stolen, we must reclaim it to inherit the promised land and the earthly rewards that God has set aside for us, rewards that others are benefitting from right now.
The road to this land could take some time, as seen in the Old Testament story, but it will happen. This message is to let us know that our suffering has not been in vain. As successful as we have become, we are still by way of laws and neglect of major institutions being taken advantage of and mistreated. There has always been Redemption for the oppressed, and it does not negate God’s love for all mankind, but just as descendants of European Jews receive earthly benefits and rewards (that were deemed for descendants of Igbos), we will reap the Godly benefit of the labor and toil of our forefathers. There are practical steps that we must take. Continue to follow me on this journey.
This is the message I now live for.
Ndidi Love 💛🖤💛